In our house we say the word FAIL means “First Attempt In Learning”. This offers us the change to change our perspective and take a word that feels ick and make it more positive. Can you change your perspective on failure to take away its power?
Let’s be real. We learn way more from the things that go wrong than those that work out perfectly. Yet, when it comes to our wellness goals we tend to be really rigid in our thinking. Why?
We are never going to be perfect at living or eating or parenting or ANYTHING. Do we really want to be? Let’s embrace the failures with compassion and curiosity. Look at them as an opportunity to learn something. We can do better next time if we view it this way. Failure offers us the opportunity to become aware and awareness can be embraced with acceptance and compassion instead of self-loathing. This in itself is a big step forward.
Here are a few examples you might connect with:
- I can’t believe I ate all of those cookies. I am the worst when it comes to self-will and healthy eating.
- Instead: It’s interesting that I can’t stop after one cookie. And now that I think about it, I am not even enjoying them. Next time I am going to do my best to give myself permission to enjoy the first cookie. I’ll try to savor it and see if that helps slow me down and allows me to feel more satisfied.
- Ugh. I stink at planning. We had take-out every night this week. I am never going to be able to cook for myself at this rate.
- Instead: This week was really busy, wasn’t it? How can I better plan ahead? Even if I start with one meal that I make myself this week. I am going to do my best to plan 2 dinners over the weekend then shop for the ingredients so they are ready to go during the week. That’s a great place to start. I’ll see how it goes and re-work from there.
- Ugh. I didn’t get to the gym again this week. I told myself I would go 3 times and I didn’t even go once. I’m such a failure.
- Instead: Three times a week might be a lofty starting goal, huh? What makes it hard for me to find the time to work out? What would be achievable? Maybe, if I can’t get to the gym, I can get my body moving in another way as a start. I like to walk. I could even walk with a friend. I’ll make a list of activities that feel achievable and enjoyable and do my best to incorporate them in a few times this week. One activity or a few smaller activities is still better than nothing.
- Instead: My body needs to rest right now. I am so maxed and and putting extra pressure on myself. This truly isn’t the right time to push myself so instead, I can get my body moving in another way that feels more appropriate. I like to walk or I can even do some simple yoga stretches on the floor today. Maybe what I really need is to sit and silence and better understand what’s going on. I’ll make a list of activities that feel achievable and enjoyable and do my best to incorporate them in a few times this week. One activity or a few smaller activities is still better than nothing.
Share, in the comments below, an “Failure” that you learned from!